"...a little bit of everything"
A cigar is just a cigar...or is it? 10/4/08
We've all seen those cheesy pamphlets the school counselors hand out at every given opportunity: "How to say no to peer
pressure" or "How to stop your bulimia" or "What to do if your dog gets rabies." I usually pass these things off as a lame joke. I
don't need a folded piece of paper telling me what to do, no matter how many poorly drawn cartoons it contains.
However, the other day at the union there was a table set up with HUNDREDS of pamphlets, and the people working at this
table yelled at me to come over and take some. "Everyone else is taking free pamphlets!" the guy shouted at me, "so should
you!" I giggled at the idea of these social workers using peer pressure to win me over and I quickly made my way over to see if
there were any pamphlets funny enough to warrant an article on my website.
I was actually pretty disappointed, because a lot of the information was about rape, AIDS, or rape and AIDS combined.
Those subjects don't make for humorous blog entries. Luckily, after ten long seconds of searching I finally spotted a pamphlet
that made my trip to the table worthwhile.
pressure" or "How to stop your bulimia" or "What to do if your dog gets rabies." I usually pass these things off as a lame joke. I
don't need a folded piece of paper telling me what to do, no matter how many poorly drawn cartoons it contains.
However, the other day at the union there was a table set up with HUNDREDS of pamphlets, and the people working at this
table yelled at me to come over and take some. "Everyone else is taking free pamphlets!" the guy shouted at me, "so should
you!" I giggled at the idea of these social workers using peer pressure to win me over and I quickly made my way over to see if
there were any pamphlets funny enough to warrant an article on my website.
I was actually pretty disappointed, because a lot of the information was about rape, AIDS, or rape and AIDS combined.
Those subjects don't make for humorous blog entries. Luckily, after ten long seconds of searching I finally spotted a pamphlet
that made my trip to the table worthwhile.
Exploding the myth: The Truth About Cigars. The cover is what sold me because it paints a very accurate picture of what a
person looks like when they smoke a cigar. From what I saw, there were no pamphlets attacking cigarettes. Only cigars.
person looks like when they smoke a cigar. From what I saw, there were no pamphlets attacking cigarettes. Only cigars.
I'm going to hunt and peck out my favorite lines.
"TV, movies and magazines push cigars as one of life's 'finer pleasures." What the heck is this? You don't see hot
celebrities on television ever smoking cigars, or anything for that matter. The only people you see smoking cigars on TV or in
the movies are badass generals with eye patches who are fighting in a war and hungry for blood. Is this article suggesting that
war is one of life's finer pleasures?
"As you smoke, your heart rate and blood pressure increase." This isn't really a con. This happens if when you go running
too. It's a side effect from the nicotine which is a reason why people smoke cigars in the first place.
"Notice all the glamorous women in cigar ads?" I don't remember seeing an ad for cigars ever in my entire life, let alone the
glamorous women supposedly in these ads.
"TV, movies and magazines push cigars as one of life's 'finer pleasures." What the heck is this? You don't see hot
celebrities on television ever smoking cigars, or anything for that matter. The only people you see smoking cigars on TV or in
the movies are badass generals with eye patches who are fighting in a war and hungry for blood. Is this article suggesting that
war is one of life's finer pleasures?
"As you smoke, your heart rate and blood pressure increase." This isn't really a con. This happens if when you go running
too. It's a side effect from the nicotine which is a reason why people smoke cigars in the first place.
"Notice all the glamorous women in cigar ads?" I don't remember seeing an ad for cigars ever in my entire life, let alone the
glamorous women supposedly in these ads.
"Do you like what you see? Is this how you want others to see you?" Cigars are manly and make you look cool. This is a
scientific fact proven in many different science laboratories. Sixty percent of the time, you look awesome all the time.
"Secondhand smoke can give you and the ones you love coughs, cold, sore throats, even cancer." Probably 90% of the
time you see someone smoking a cigar it's an old guy sitting in a rocking chair on his porch by himself. Let the old man do what
he wants, he's not hurting anyone.
It just occurred to me that the cigar smokers featured in this pamphlet are all African-American. WHAT WERE THE MAKERS
TRYING TO GET AT?
scientific fact proven in many different science laboratories. Sixty percent of the time, you look awesome all the time.
"Secondhand smoke can give you and the ones you love coughs, cold, sore throats, even cancer." Probably 90% of the
time you see someone smoking a cigar it's an old guy sitting in a rocking chair on his porch by himself. Let the old man do what
he wants, he's not hurting anyone.
It just occurred to me that the cigar smokers featured in this pamphlet are all African-American. WHAT WERE THE MAKERS
TRYING TO GET AT?